Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
This house was built for laser tag.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Randomize
