ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
