youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
