The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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