Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So squirting runs in the family.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
