And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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