I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
we're making bets on your personal life
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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