Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
40s are totally the cure
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
