Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
