your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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