your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
