i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize