everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
There's always time for handjobs
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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