Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
