A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize
