yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I deserve to be covered in dicks
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
