Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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