You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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