Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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