Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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