I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
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