You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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