just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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