I think I am morally bankrupt
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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