One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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