i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
