you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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