Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
