Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
