she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
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