How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
whose parrot is this?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
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