just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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