This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
