Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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