I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Randomize