I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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