Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.