If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
