This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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