Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Randomize
