We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
