That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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