I wish I only lived at night.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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