I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I believe in your delicious
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
