do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
