Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
