She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize