Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
try to milk me bitch
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