Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize