Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
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