In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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